Friday, November 23, 2012

Thanksgiving time!

Happy Friday to ya'll!
I hope everyone had a great THanksgiving.
We, in general, have so much to be thankful for.
I was especially thankful this year to be able to celebrate Thanksgiving at home
instead of in a hospital.
I'm even more thankful tobe alive, to be cancer-free and to be part of such a great family!
Yesterday we had Thanksgiving festivities all day long.
I didn't catch many pictures but I did manage to snap two before all the chaos began.
 My precious Sara Faith & June Claire
June Claire, Sara, Cade & Tiffany
We ended the night with shopping from around 9 until 4:30 this morning.
I have a love-hate relationship with Black Friday...mostly love.
But I can't stand the lines!
Now that Thanksgiving is offically over....
bring on Christmas!
It's my FAVORITE time of year and I can't wait to bring out the decorations.
I have a lot of recipes I want to try & we have something special planned
every weekend between now & December 25.
What's your favorite time of the year?
I'm not going to be here as much because my hard drive crashed on my laptop
and I only use the computer when we are at my mothers.
I tried to blog from my phone, but apparently I'm not quite that advanced yet. :)

Thursday, November 22, 2012

one year.

November 21, 2011.
One year.
Praise the Lord.

It started with a trip to the local clinic because I thought I had an earache.
Two hospitals later, a doctor walked into my room.
Stood at the end of my bed, looked me straight in the eye,
and something I never expected came out of his mouth.
"I believe you have Leukemia. This type is rare. It'll be hard, but you have a chance."
I didn't think my life was over.
I was NOT giving up.
I just asked, "What do I have to do to fight it?"
I took a shower that night. Washed my beautiful, dark, long hair that I was so proud of.
I got weak and had to sit on the bed to blowdry it.
I thought, "This is the last time I'll blowdry this head of hair."
That night, I was told I had bleeding behind my eyes --
that was why my eyesight was getting worse.
I laid in the bed with my husband and tried to memorize his face.
I wanted to remember his clear blue eyes.
His crooked smile, and the lines across his forehead when he wrinkled his brow.
That funny little crease on the side of his mouth.
My baby girls (then 4 and 1) could not come see me.
Devestated isn't even the word.
Two days later, the day before Thanksgiving, I was transferred to a much larger hospital.
I remember having a serious argument with the Oncologist who sent me because I just wanted to go home for that one day. I couldn't understand what just one day would hurt.
I had no idea.
I vaguely remember getting to Atlanta. I don't remember checking into my room.
By the end of the week, the doctors had placed me into a medically induced coma.
My body needed all of its strength to fight. Hard.
Sometime between Sunday night & Monday morning, the doctors called the family in.
"Six hours," they said. "We've done all we can do."
Friends, THAT is when fervent prayers started reaching Heaven.
Things began to look up quickly.
After somewhere between two and three weeks, I woke up.
A joyful time that was quicly clouded when the realization came that I couldn't move
And I couldn't see anything but shadows.
But I didn't care.
Because I was alive.
I had to learn to move, walk, talk, see, etc. again.
But that was nothing.
I was alive.
After two long months, I was able to see my sweet girls.
I haven't taken a second for gratned since.
And you better not, either.
You never know when that moment may be your last.
In February, I was 88% cancer free.
In April, I was declared to be in remission.
I've finished two phases of chemo and am on my last.
Life is so good. But not just because I got myself back.
I learned a lot during my time in the hospital, and in the months that have followed.
I have learend to trust in trust doctors...
I have learned what love is...I'm trying to learn not to be selfish.
I am forgiven for my sins.
There is absolutely no way in this world that I could have come this far without Him.
Without the prayers of friends and family...and people I don't even know.
Thank you for the suppers cooked, the taking of the girls so I could rest,
the help cleaning house, driving me to run errands, driving me to doctors appointments
and last but certainly not least, taking me to chemo appointments.
They say it takes a village to raise a child.
It also takes that same village to help one overcome cancer.
My husband commented to me the other day that as the weather was getting cooler,
he was beginning to feel sad. I didn't understand. I asked him why.
Because the warm summer days were starting to have chilly mornings.
Darkness was coming sooner rather than later.
Then I understood.
I wonder if he'll always feel sad this time of year?
I wonder if I will always get nervous at doctors appointments?
There will always be doubts...
but there can also be peace.
I'm so thankful for that.

Monday, November 5, 2012

a new chapter

I have a "little' cousin, Bo -- me & Bo have always been kinda close.
They lived right behind us growing up & we played ogether a lot.
I'm several years a wee bit older than he is, so he was always like a little brother.
Bo graduated high school this past May (with honors -- soooo proud!)
and it was definitely a very emotional day for me.
I'm pretty sure I cried as much as his parents/grandparents.
Back at the beginning of the summer, before graduation,
he started talking to us about joining the Air Force.
(For those of you who don't know -- my husband is active duty AF)
Eventually he said he wanted to join.
Wanted to serve his country, waanted to have a stable job,
and wanted to make something of himself --
something that's hard to do in our tiny one-horse town.
Needless to say, I was all over it. I said it was the best thing he could ever do.
And in reality I know it is.
A couple of weekends ago, we went to his going away party.
AKA -- "Hair Shaving Ceremony"
We teased him endlessly because he had gorgeous dark hair
that he styled all Justin Bieber-ish and treated like his child!
The picture above is Mike (and June & Bo's dad!) taking his turn at shaving "the child."
I got some hilarious video footage.
I'm pretty sure he would kill me if I posted it.
He better be glad I couldn't get iti to upload!
After the shave!
Last night and today were definitely bittersweet in our family.
Bo left for basic training.
Even just typing that makes me tear up.
I think I'm so emotional party because I KNOW the pain of being apart from your family.
We have a super close family and it is hard to realize he's grown.
I know he'll never live here again and I may never, either...
and I know it's the best decision for him...
but I still miss him loads.
Bo, I am so PROUD of you!
I couldn't get it out last night without snot bubbling on your shoulder,
but I'm very proud of you.
You're going to excel in your career & you'll be an officer in no time flat.
I refuse to say "goodbye" because in the AIr Force we say "see you later!"
Now not only are you a cousin and friend...beloved to my girls...
but you are a brother-in-arms to my husband.
A wingman.
That's an honor far above anythign else.
Love you kid & can't wait to see you in January at graduation!

Of we go, into the wild blue yonder...